engineers choice

Aise apni Wife ho.

5' 6" jiski height ho, 

Jeans jiski tight ho, 

Chehara jiska bright ho, 

Umar 22 se 27 ho, 

Aise apni Wife ho.

Sadak per sab kahe kya cute ho, 

Bhid me sab kahe side ho, side ho, 

Mumbai, Delhi ya Punjab ki paidaish ho, 

Sas ki seva jiski khwahish ho 

Aisi apni Wife ho.

Padosi jab baat kare to haath me knife ho, 

Dinner ke time candle light ho, 

Ham me tum me kabhi na koi fight ho, 

Milane ke baad dil delight ho, 

Hey prabhu teri 'puja,shanti aur Bhakti' meri life ho. 

Yeh kavita padhne ke baad log kahe "chikne, tum right ho", 

Aise apni Wife ho.

kaash yeh concept .-1% percent bhi right ho 

agar aisi apni wife ho 

to kya hasin life ho 

har kisi ki yahi farmaish ho 

kudrat ki bhi aajmaish ho 

khudah ke software mein bhi bug ki gunjaish ho 

ay kaash, kahin to ek aisi paidaish ho 

aisi apni wife ho.

Tab fir Temporary nahin permanent life ho, 

Mein bhi ghode pe bethu jab meri sagai ho, 

yaar bas aisi aapni wife ho. ..

it engineer ka izhaar

 

Tumse mila main kal to,
mere dil mein hua ek sound,
Lekin aaj tum mili to kehti ho:
Your file not found!

Aisa bhi nahin hai ke,
I don`t like your face
Par dil ke computer mein,
nahin hai enough disk space

Ghar se nikalti ho tum jab,
pehen ke evening gown
Too many requests se,
ho jaata hai server down

Tumhaare liye pyaar ki application,
create main karoonga
Tum usse debug karna,
wait main karoonga

Tumhaara intezaar karte karte,
main so gaya
Yeh dekho mera connection,
time out ho gaya

pyar ka computer

ek computer engineer ki love story:-

Abhi Abhi To Pyaar Ka Computer Kiya Hai Chaaloo
Aab Main Dil Ki Hard Disk Pe Aur Kitni Files Daaloo

Apne Chehare Se Ruswaai Ka Error To Hatao
Ai Jaaneman Apne Dil Ka Password To Batao

Woh To Hum Hain Jo Aap Ki Chahat Dil Main Rakhte Hain
Warna Aap Jaise Kitney Hi Softwares Bazaar Main Bikte Hain
Roz Raat Ko Aap Mere Sapne Main Aate Ho
Mere Pyar Ko Mouse Bana Ke Ungaliyon Pe Nachaate Ho

Tere Pyar Ka Email Mere Dil Ko Lubhataa Hai
Par Beech Main Tere Baap Ka Virus Aataa Hai

Aur Karvaaoge Humse Kitnaa Intezaar
Hamaare Dil Ki Site Pe Kabhi Enter To Maro Yaar

Apni Insult Ka Badalaa Dekhna Main Kaise Loonga
Jaaneman Tere Baap Ko Shift Delete Kar Doonga

Aap Jaiso Ke Liye Dil Ko Cut Ker Diya Karte Hai
Warna Baaki Cases Main To Copy Paste Kiya Karte Hai

Aapka Hasnaa Aap Ka Chalnaa Aap Ki Woh Style
Aapke Adaaon Ki Hamne Save Hai Kar Li File

engineer ke sapne

 Mera source code Padh kar hasana nahi,
Ise chalta dekh tum fasana nahi....
Main testing karata Hun Boss ki Kasam,
Bina piye Whisky, Beer ya Rum....
------ MUSIC --------
Bill Gates milaa muze raste mein,
Beche Windows usne mujhe saste mein,
Usne kaha "Tuze CEO banaoon"
Ghar tere aake Operator ban jaaoon
Bill Gates ko kaha mere ghar na aana
Bill Joy ko bol diya na baba naa
Chaahe Boston me dede muze BMW car
Ya H-1 pe dede muze dollar Dus Hazaar
Par development ke liye main to kachchaa Hun
Dus saal se Porting me Achchaa Hun....
------ MUSIC --------
(slow)
Mere daddoo , likhe Software
Bina use kiye , koi Hardware
Meri Beti , banegi Aunty
Jab tak inst all , hoga NT
(fast)
Release ho raha hai mera Software naya
Unix ko DOS pe hai port kiya
Microsoft NE jab mera H-1 kiya
Bug Free Windows Maine release kiyaa ..
Nice hai na bhai.................!

engineering ka banda

Wo dekho ek ENGINEERING ka Banda ja raha hai ...
Zindagi se hara hua hai ....

Par "job dhundne" se haar nahi maanta,
Apne presentation ki ek line isey rati
hui hai....

par aaj kaun se rang ke moje pehne hain,
ye nahi jaanta,
  
Din par din ek excel file banata ja raha hai..

Wo dekho ek ENGINEERING ka Banda ja raha hai ...

Das hazaar job mein se ache
  job dhoond lete hain lekin ,

Majboor dost ki ankhhon ki nami
dikhayi nahi deti,

PC pe hazzar windows khuli hain,
Par dil ki khidki pe koi dastak sunayi nahi deti...

Saturday-Sunday nahata nahi ,
Weekdays ko naha raha hai...

Wo dekho ek ENGINEERING ka Banda ja raha hai ...

Reporting karte karte pata hi nahi chala,
"Boss" kab maa baap se bhi bade ho gaye,

Kitabon me gulab rakhne wala,
Cigrette me kho gaya,

Weekends pe daroo pee ke jo jashn mana raha hai ,

Wo dekho ek ENGINEERING ka Banda ja raha hai ...................................

new khatri's poem for engineers

मानस खत्री की यह कविता हमने ई – पत्रिका के सौजन्य से ली है लेकिन यह कविता बड़ी ही विचारणीय है कि किस प्रकार उम्मीदों के बोझ तले हम युवाओं को दबा देते हैं. इस कविता का सार यूं तो सबको समझ आ जाएगा लेकिन इसके पीछे छुपा मूल विचार है “जीवन में जो भी करो वह पूरे दिल से करो.”

इंजीनियर अस्तु
लिखा-पढ़ा जो Science में Engineer ही बनना है,हर माँ-बाप की बस यही तमन्ना है।

अपने कुल का झंडा सबसे ऊँचा करना है,भाई-बहनों से भी अपने आगे बढ़ना है।दसवीं कक्षा से ही होती शुरू है अपनी Battle

विदेश जा कर ही आखिर सबको होना है Settleतकनीकी प्रगति में लिखना अगला पन्ना है,हर माँ-बाप………………………..

B-tech है या कोई Virus या है कोई बीमारी,एक Football के पीछे पड़ी है दुनिया सारी।Injection, Tablet, Operation से इलाज होता है,गलती से जो बने Patient 4 साल रोता है।अगल-बगल ने फैले Virus रहना चैकन्ना है,हर माँ-बाप………………………..

Mushroom से खुलते College शहर, गली, चैराहे,I.I.T. में हो Selection मन सबका यही चाहे।म्दहपदममतपदह का घोड़ा 55-60 वाले दौड़ाएं,50 प्रतिशत वाले भी गड़ाएं हैं निगाहें।चाहे जो भी हो, ताज Engineering का ही पहनना है,हर माँ-बाप………………………..

बादाम-अखरोट से होगा क्या Physics-Chemistry लगाओ,Mathematics है महासंकट, हे बजरंगबली बचाओ।कर लो जाप सभी तुम चाहे संगम में नहाना,पप्पू होना पास, हमें भी Dairy-Milk खिलाना।बिन Entertainment के जूस, Student सूखा-गन्ना है,हर माँ-बाप………………………..

सबकी कटोरी में Placement का सिक्का कैसे आए?Displacement से बेहतर है, M.B.A. में घुस जाएं।नोंक जिनकी अब भी हो Sharp, MTech में रंग जमायेंगे,सब बाकी ठहरे कम से कम Engineer तो कहलायेंगे।बन्नी है Engineering, Science वाला बन्ना है,हर माँ-बाप………………………..

Engineering करि-करि जग मुआ Successful भया न कोए,मन से काज जो भी किया सफलता चरणम् धोए।हो Engineer सा हुनर तो ही इस ओर आना,सिर्फ Degree वाले Engineer बन मत देश का नाम डुबाना,जैसी प्रतिभा हो, वैसा ही अब बनना है।

funny engineers scrap

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Aksar Phasta Hai
Interviews Ke Sawaal Mae
Badi Companiyon Ki Chaal Mae
Boss Aur Client Ke Bawaal Mae

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Pak Gaya Hai
Meetings Ki Jhelai Mae
Submissions Ki Gehrai Mae
Teamwork Ki Chatai Mae

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Laga Rahta Hai
Schedule Ko Failane Mae
Targets Ko Khiskaane Mae
Roz Naye-Naye Bahane Mae

Engineer Woh Hai Jo
Lunch Time Mae Breakfast Karta Hai
Dinner Time Mae Lunch Karta Hai
Commutation Ke Waqt Soya Karta Hai

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Pagal Hai
Chai Aur Samose Ke Pyar Mae
Cigeratte Ke Khumar Mae
Birdwatching Ke Vichar Mae

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Khoya Hai
Reminders Ke Jawaab Mae
Na Milne Wale Hisaab Mae
Behtar Bhavishya Ke Khwaab Mae

Engineer Woh Hai Jise Intezaar Hai
Weekend Night Manane Ka
Boss Ke Chhutti Jaane Ka
Increment Ki Khabar Aane Ka

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Sochta Hai
Kaash Padhai Pe Dhyaan Diya Hota
Kaash Teacher Se Panga Na Liya Hota
Kaash Ishq Na Kiya Hota
Aur Sabse Behtar To Ye Hota
Kambakht Engineering Hi Na Kiya Hota…….. ….

funny definations by engineer

Funny meanings...

CIGARETTE:
A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other!

...

MARRIAGE:
It's an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor's degree and a woman gains her master's.

CONFERENCE:
The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

CONFERENCE ROOM:
A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees in the end.

SMILE:
A curve that can set a lot of things straight!

YAWN:
The only opportunity some married men
ever get to open their mouths.

EXPERIENCE:
The name men give to their mistakes.

DIPLOMAT:
A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.

OPTIMIST:
A person who, while falling from the EIFFEL TOWER, says midway:
"SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!"

BOSS:
Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

POLITICIAN:
One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence afterward.

DOCTOR:
A person who kills your ills with pills and later with his bills... :-)

life without engineer

for few minutes ,everyone of you think about "what life will be, if engineers were not there".if you see the past you will able to conclude the role of engineers in one's life.

***LIFE WITHOUT COMMUNICATION ENGINEERS:-

BIRDS CARRYING LETTERS

POSTMAN USING BIRDS

PAST PHONE DESIGNED

***LIFE WITH COMMUNICATION ENGINEERS:-

TALKING ON MOBILE

CONFERENCING ON LAPTOP

***LIFE WITHOUT CIVIL ENGINEERS:-

PAST BRIDGE

PAST HOUSE

***LIFE WITH CIVIL ENGINEERS:-

MODERN BRIDGE

MODERN BUILDINGS

***LIFE WITHOUT AERONAUTICAL ENGINEERS:-

PAST AIRCRAFT

***LIFE WITH AERONAUTICAL ENGINEER

MODERN AIRCRAFT

***LIFE WITHOUT MECHANICAL ENGINEERS:-

PAST TOUR

PAST TOURISM

***LIFE WITH MECHANICAL ENGINEERS:-

MODERN TOUR

MODERN TOUR

***LIFE WITHOUT IT ENGINEERS:-

PAST CALCULATORS

***LIFE WITH IT ENGINEERS:-

MODERN CALCULATORS

MODERN CALCULATORS

now after removing these modern technologies provided to the world by engineers,think what the world will be without engineers.

so engineers are the backbone of the today's world. without them the survival in today's world is a harsh situation.so be proud to be an engineers.

top engineers of the world

engineers are one of the noble respectful person of the society,without whom the society cannot progress.

many of one says that "engineers are the heart of the world" as just without the heart the body will stop working, in the same way without engineers the world will stop and life would not exist.

i am mentioning here list of some top  engineers who had contributed a lot in this progressive
world.
on there contribution the world has improved so far and on their research new outcomes and benefited is been contributed to the world.

top engineers of this world are listed below:-

NAME:-leonarardo di ser piero da vinci
DATE OF BIRTH:-april 15,1452
DEATH DATE:-may 02,1915
BIRTH PLACE:-vinci,italy

1.LEONARDO DA VINCI :-one of the great visionary of the past who has a foresight of everything from the helicopter flying in air to the submarines moving under water.
he was a well known
artist,mathematician,musician,engineer,inventor of all time.
his most famous achivements as an artist was the most famous painting of all time,the "MONA LISA" and "THE LAST SUPPER".
his inventions and observations were recorded in 13,000 pages of notes and drawing, including design of flying machines,plant studies,war machines,anatomy and architecture.
his drawing in biological fields such as a fetus in utero,heart and vascular system,sex organs are some on the first human record.
his architectures and inventory and till date used in various fields in different parts of the world.even painting of "MONA LISA" is one of the great painting in the art and craft history for which he is remembered till date.

NAME:-thomus alva edison
DATE OF BIRTH:-february 11,1847
DEATH DATE:-october 18,1931
BIRTH PLACE:-canada

  2.THOMUS EDISON:-edision is the most polific inventor in       history holding a unique record of 1,097 patents.
he was a well known entrepreneur and inventor of all time.
his famous achivements in the field of inventory are phonograph,electric bulb,stock tester,motion picture camera,projector and many more for which he is remembered till date.
for "electric bulb" he was famous as an inventor of all time.
he is well known for creation of world's first industrial research laboratory and his technique is followed till date by the industrialists of the world.
his first electrical plant and industrial infrastructure is remembered till date.
his inventory was based on important experiments and observations performed by him at his own laboratory.

at a age of 12,he started publishing his own small newspaper,called the "Grand Trunk Herald" .
the world will never forget him as he had brighted the world with "ELECTRIC BULB".

NAME:-henry ford
DATE OF BIRTH:-july 30,1863
DEATH  DATE:-april 07,1947
BIRTH PLACE:-america

3.HENRY FORD:-he was a great entrepreneur and inventor of all time.after a few trials building cars and and companies,in 1903 he established ford motor company.
he created the "FORD MODEL T CAR" in 1908 and went on to develop theassembly line mode of production,which revolutionised the infrastructucture of car model by creating ford model and then managed a more efficient way to mass produce car in order to lower the price.
He looked at other industries and found four principles that would further their goal: interchangeable parts, continuous flow, division of labor, and reducing wasted effort.
as a result of ford's inventory,FORD sold millions of cars andbecame a world famous company head. 

NAME:-wilbur wright
DATE OF BIRTH:-april 16,1867
DEATH  DATE:-may 30,1912
BIRTH  PLACE:-millville,indiana

4.WILBUR WRIGHT:- was the elder brother of orville,with whom he developed the first successful flying AIRPLANE.
the wright brothers are known as "father of modern aviation".
wilber wright and orville wright are remembered till date for the inventory of airplane.
he first designed various gliders by following his experiments,they created a pulley system that altered the shape of the wing in the mid flight ,increasing and decreasing the speeds.
they were the first to design airplane and aerodynamic theory.
his theory is followed till date ,only the shapes designed by him is changed in modern world.
now,with his gifted theory to the world, people covers long distances in short time.

defination of an engineer

an engineer is a surgeon who with his technical knowledge,mathematics and ingenuity treat the technical,social and economical problems occurring in not only this world,but also outside the world in the vast universe.
he is the one who with his presence of mind,technical research and observations can create a solution to each and every problems occurring in the vast universe.
when you wake up in the morning to the time when you go to bed in the night,99% of the daily needs items are engineers gift to you or the society.
so engineers are one who can construct and destruct the world after the whole sole super power who lives in sky between stars and get challenged by the engineers per day from morning to night.
engineers change the world our world works in different ways.they are the revolutionaries in this world and fight for the welfare of society and even this world.
Engineers participate in the activities which make the resources of nature available in a form beneficial to man and provide systems which will perform optimally and economically .